Most of us are fortunate enough to live in places where we’re free to choose how we live. What we think, what we do for a living, how we spend our time – for the most part, we choose all of those for ourselves.

“Independence” can refer to so many things. When we talk about our prosperity, what do we want to be independent of? From what must we declare our freedom?

Here’s a big one: independence from the limitations of the opinions of others. Many of us feel the conscious or unconscious need to live up – or down – to the expectations of others.

We’re playing roles in our families that we’re reluctant to break out of. Maybe our parents set parameters for our lives – big ones or small ones – and we’re afraid to burst through those boundaries and “disappoint” them.

We’re uncomfortable if we rise above our current peer group. That’s not just because we want to fit in, but also because our peers make us feel uncomfortable if we don’t. Many of the people who are in the same situation we are don’t want us to break out of it. If we do, it reminds them that they could too, if they wanted to. But they haven’t made the decision to do what it would take, and that’s not a good feeling. Even if they don’t actively hold us back, they don’t encourage us to break the mold.

I’ve heard it said that where you’ll be in five years can be predicted by looking at the five people you spend most of your time with. Why would that be? Because that’s the mindset you build around yourself. That’s the energy you spend your time in. If you consistently surround yourself with people in the same circumstances you’re in, you’re not in an environment that will help you generate new ideas that would move you beyond. And if you do come up with these ideas, you’re not supported in developing and pursuing them.

In his highly motivating book “Prosperity”, Charles Fillmore writes:

We’re lucky enough to live in societies that allow us our choices. What a waste it would be to not give ourselves the chance to exercise them.

About the Author